For Whom? A Poem

This being that I am was created for something

What I will never truly know

But to say that I have not strived for something greater would be a shame

But to whom? Myself? God?

I don't really understand why I have not accomplished what I consider great things

But it apparently is not for me to know

Why not? I ask.

When and what will it look like if I were to do some thing great

For whom? Myself? God?

I know I am just a piddly little speck of dirt amongst the world of beings

But why must I desire to do great and not accept those things I do as great?

For whom? Myself? God?

I am often told or reminded that I need to be thankful for what I have accomplished

I say I am, but what about my doing great things, I say to myself

For whom? Myself? God?

I have become and still do sometimes feel frustrated when I see others doing great things

And I look at myself and my life and say, what great things have I done?

I have done the usual - married a wonderful man, adopted wonderful kiddles, have security, a home, extended families on both sides, own two cars and one kitty that likes to sleep on my pillow at night.

But I still say, so what? Lots of people have done those very things or have those very things, why am I not doing great things?

For whom? Myself? God?

I have gone round and round with this question for as long as I can remember.

I have tired from it but still can't seem to let go of its ideology for myself.

When all is said and done, I wonder if I will STILL be wondering when and what great things I will do

For whom? Myself? God?

Today I can say I am silly for having this notion but tomorrow I will still ask the same question

When and what great things will I be doing

For whom? Myself? God?

And tomorrow I will hear that I AM DOING GREAT THINGS and to just shut the hell up

But deep down those words are just not enough to hear

Until I hear it from the one that created me

Because it is of that one that I have the beef with and I am wanting to know

For whom? Myself? God?