Are they twins?

It's interesting how we as humans are so fascinated by twins and more. Until we had these two boys, I was always asking others if their children were twins and how did they get along, etc.
I think it's funny that I still did this even though I had worked and roomed with identical twins in college. Multiples are definitely a fascinating phenomenon to the human psyche.

I had always wanted twins, thinking that it would be the fastest way to have the twelve kiddles I always wanted. I knew I never wanted triplets or quads because my poor under 5 foot body frame would never be able to handle it. As it is, I never had to bore any child through this body. And I still got twin-like kiddles. Now that's a miracle!!

It never fails when we go out with the boys, whether as a little family of four or just me and the boys, the question always gets asked, 'Are they twins?'. Most folks get the look of deer in headlights when we say they are just shy of a month apart. Others are still not sure if they heard correct and ask for correction, and others go on as if it were a normal situation. With the latter folks, we just chuckle inside and move right along.

I think the greatest thing about having others ask us about the twinship of the boys is that I (most often) get to hear some amazing stories of those who were adopted or gave up their own child or had them taken away from them. Otherwise I would never had met these folks and learned something new about my greater world. Also, it definitely has been a conversation opener of my being an adoptee.

So, if M no longer is with us, we will no longer have the twins question being asked and that will just add another dimension to our loss of him in our lives.

But I know the final answer has yet to be answered and so I (we) continue to enjoy, spoil and embrace our time and lives with M.

So my time with twins may possibly be short lived but I must say, I will have enjoyed it immensely while it have lasted.

I can't imagine anything else but them...

I Forgot...

Oh ya, I forgot that they both will do anything to have you not put them in their car seat. That could include screaming, crying, arching the ol' back, grabbing a hold of your neck with their nails embedded, as well as holding on to anything that will allow them more time of what they figure is freedom. And sometimes I can't blame them, especially come summer when it is bloody hot in the van. But otherwise, they are riding in shear comfort, an Eddie Bauer brand car seat. What's not to like??!! Ha!

Let's see - the other things that occur in our household is with N not sleeping at night because he is too busy working on his rolling over stuff. He has decided it's play time or exercise time, which ever way he wants to look at it. We just crack up and wonder what he will do next. It's all a new thing for him so he is just trying to figure it all out in his timing, of course.

This Wednesday will be a very hard day for Michael and me. Neither of us are looking forward to it. But it was eventually coming and we knew it. It just sucks that reality has to hit. We are having to bring M to visitation and leave him there for the full day, 9am-4pm. This will be the first time we've been away from him for that long a time during visitation. Up until now he had had only a two hour visit with his birth dad. Actually, it's never easy to leave him even for the two hour visit. Basically because we just wish he could be ours forever. But we signed up for this and new what the game plan was and were willing to play along. But, again, reality sets in and BAM! it hits like a mac truck. Even when we know it's coming, it still seems to side swipe us emotionally. It just totally sucks!!!!!

So when I hear M cry, whine or scream, I just enjoy it for what it is because I know I may not be hearing it after August 15th. I just want to cry a river...